We'll do the momma first:
1) I attended an extremely ghetto fabulous junior high and high school in Rhode Island. I later found references to my school in sociological books in a college class. (and they were not positive references!)
You know your school is ghetto when high school orientation contained the words ("some of you will not make it out of here alive", and they had statistics to back it up!)
How hot is she? This could have been me...